A World Without Rape

THE STORY: Upper East Side. Middle of the night. Man climbs in through window 27 year woman wakes up during the process of being raped.

COULD THIS HAVE BEEN PREVENTED: This one is probably going to have aLOT of people saying, “Of course it could have been prevent. Close the window!” In my book, Preventing Sexual Assault: 171 Ways, an entire chapter is devoted to safety in the home.

There are several issues here so sit back. I will ask certain questions or make certain points and address each as a separate item.

1) How many of us sleep with our windows open instead of running the air conditioning? I say “us” because I am one of these people.

In this particular case, many of the units in this part of town have what are known as window gates. Picture a metal gate that can be opened or closed and you get the idea. The problem is many people leave these gates open, making for easy access to rapists, burglars or other criminals.

I always tell people that they should NEVER leave first floor windows open. If you are going to leave a sliding door or window open leave it no more than maybe 6 or 7 inches and make sure the window or door can be locked into position.

I suggest that if there is easy access to 2nd stories – - such as is the case with many townhouse style homes, that people apply the same rules.

2) I have a screen on my window. So even though the window is open, I would hear someone trying to pull the screen off.

Right and wrong. Yes, most people would be awakened by an intruder attempting to remove a screen. HOWEVER, something as simple as a pen knife (small knife with a blade of less than an inch or two) can easily cut through most screens. Intruders don’t want to go through the hassle or the risk of waking occupants by trying to remove the screens – - they just take 10 seconds to cut the screen out and climb in.

If you are relying on a screen to stop and intruder at least hang some type of noisemaker in or near enough that if the screen is removed or someone climbs in, noise will be made and hopefully they will be scared off.

Best practice: assume the screen is not even there. Would you still feel comfortable being asleep? If the answer is “no” then do not leave your window open more than several inches and make sure it is locked into position.

3) One of the residents commented that she was keeping a baseball bat next to her bed “just in case.”

It makes no difference if you have a bat or even a gun, when we are in REM sleep, very little is going to wake us up. By the time you realize an intruder is in your room, it’s already too late. Do not count on weapons to keep you safe. Make sure these people can’t get into your home to begin with.

Further, in many situations weapons end up being used against the homeowner. They are valuable in situations where, let’s say someone has accessed the downstairs part of your home but has not yet gained access to your bedroom. But even in this case, having a lock on your bedroom door and calling 911 is still your best bet.

Somewhere in America a woman is raped approximately every 35 seconds. A couple more are sexually assaulted. And while approximately 80% of these occur where the victim knows her assailant, that still leaves a HUGE number where the victim does NOT.

Whether attempting to prevent rape or any other type of home intrusion crime, make sure windows that can be easily accessed remain closed and locked or locked into open positions of no more than 6 or 7 inches.

Your comments or ideas on safety tips you’ve heard??

With publicity ramping up for the yet-to-be release of a movie containing a particularly violent rape scene, I chose today to respond.

There are 2 types of rape scenes. The first glamorizes rape and the second attempts to depict it in all it’s violence and tragedy.

In the movie The Passion of Christ, we saw Jesus tortured and killed. While the experience of watching this was moving for Christians and non-Christians alike, things can be taken too far.

In court rooms, prosecutors often avoid using color photographs of victims who have experienced savage physical attacks. Studies have shown that juries are turned off by such photographs and will actually lose favor for the prosecution/victim because of what they feel to be excessive prosecutorial zeel. In other words, juries feel that a prosecutor is somehow trying to paint the case so as to get a conviction “at all costs.” Juries don’t like this and will respond to it by coming back with not-guilty verdicts even in cases where guilt is evident.

I met a young woman once who said she fantasized about being raped. I responded, “Really?” I then walked up behind her and without touching her, whispered 7 words into her ear. He body trembled. I asked her if she was still interested in experiencing being raped. She said, “No.”

It is virtually impossible to truly exhibit rape in all its badness since much of the fallout experienced through this crime is psychological in nature. So while the actual criminal act can be depicted, it fails to do justice to the true brutality of the crime itself.

Next there are shows or movies that will display rapes and sexual assaults for their entertainment value. “Entertainment value” refers to part of a story or part of a story line. Again, the actual depiction fails to connect viewers to the true savagery of such attacks and it therefore leaves them with this sense of “sexual assault isn’t really that big of a deal.” The majority of these depictions merely serve (albeit in many cases, inadvertently) to minimize the true nature of rape and sexual assault.

Add to the above situation, story lines where the victim ends up falling in love with and marrying her attacker and you have entered a completely new realm of disconnect between the writers of these shows and real life. Could you picture being robbed by 3 or 4 men, who then savagely beat you using baseball bats and knives? You lose one of your eyes from the attack. You experiencing brain damage and other visible scars from the attack. Well multiply this times 100 and you might start to see how it is INSANE to think that a rape victim could ever fall in love with her attacker.

Do I think rape scenes should be shown in movies or on TV? No – - not really. Such depictions fail to ever capture the true brutality of this crime. And because of this, the crime is minimized in the eyes of the viewers.

In his study titled The Mental Health Impact of Rape, Dean Kilpatrick, Ph.D., found the following:
Almost one-third of rape victims experienced post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Rape victims were 3 times more likely than women who were not victims of a violent crime to experience a major depressive episode.
A victim of rape was 13 times more likely than a non-crime victim to have attempted suicide.
1 in 8 rape victims has attempted suicide.
Rape victims were 13 times more likely to have a problem with alcohol.
Rape victims were 26 times more likely to have some type of drug abuse problem.

Can the true nature of rape and/or sexual assault be depicted on either the big or small screen? No.

YOUR THOUGHTS??